The Blanket

I’m not exaggerating when I tell people it’s like Halloween every day in this house. Some people have an abiding love of angel knickknacks. Some collect fine porcelain. Me? If it has a skull on it, odds are it will find a place in my home.

That being said, it’s not all gloom. There’s a sugar skull, embellished and dainty. There’s the vodka, the cut-glass bottle gleaming like crystal.

And now there’s this:

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It took me about four months, during which time I had to teach myself to crochet. It weighs a ton, and the colours are even more eye-searing in real life. It’s gaudy and kitschy and I’m so damn proud of myself for finishing the thing.

And now that winter is kinda, sorta finally here, I plan to spend my lazy Sunday afternoon curled beneath this Technicolor monstrosity, book in hand and coffee at the ready.

(To give credit where credit is due, I stole the idea from Granny Mania via Pinterest. But those 630 squares? All me, baby.)

The Further Domestication of One Mrs. Snider

I was baking cookies last night (because yesterday was Saturday and Saturdays are for baking) and managed to spill cinnamon everywhere, including all over my pants. Sexy. I figured it’s about time I do something about this whole wearing-what-I’m-cooking thing.

I just bought the most adorable apron:

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Look at how cute that is! I’m 100% certain it will make my already-stellar baking taste even better. I mean, seriously. How could it not?

(photo belongs to Etsy seller Boojiboo, who stocks the cutest vintage-inspired aprons I have ever seen, including this horror movie piece.)

PS – Honourable mention goes to @falconjockey on Twitter for suggesting a Darth Vader apron, though my tastes run a little more to Fifties Housewife than Dark Space Lord.

Super-Last-Minute Holiday Knitting Patterns

I FINISHED MY CHRISTMAS KNITTING!!!

Ohhhhh yeahhhh, that feels nice.

It’s a tradition of mine to make presents that are much more complicated/time-consuming/difficult than they ought to be, and then to procrastinate, which usually means panicked Christmas Eve crafting and cursing. I always pull it out at the end, but there’s always that awful feeling of what if.

Not this year.

I can’t talk about it yet, or post pictures, because my family reads my blog, but trust me: IT RULES. Pics to follow after Christmas.

In the meantime, if you’re panicked and looking for something last-minute to knit, check out these patterns:

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And if you’re really pressed for time:

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I made a tiny sweater once. It only took an afternoon, and came out really cute:
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You’ve got two full days to finish your shit. You got this.

Darken Up Your Christmas

It’s that time of year! Christmas music EVERYWHERE, glitter on everything, creepy life-sized Santa figures at the Chinese buffet…

Whether we like it or not, Christmas dominates the malls, the tv, and the radio. But thanks to Etsy, horror fans everywhere can at least make it a little more tolerable. Observe:

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Day of the Dead His and Hers Christmas Stocking

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Zombie Christmas Cards (Art by Robert Walker)

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Ho Ho With a Shotgun

(Click on item descriptions to visit their artists’ respective Etsy shops. I’m not affiliated with any of these sellers.)