Author: Stefanie Snider

Novelist, wife, vengeful harpy.

Writing a Novel? Cool Story, Bro.

Stefanie Snider

Since I mentioned starting to write a novel, I’ve had mixed response from people I know. Most have been supportive, as I knew they would.

A few, though, have been a little skeptical. No one’s said it, of course. But there’s a certain look in the eye, a certain…pause…before saying anything, that gives it away.

I can see why.

Writing a novel seems to be one of those things that people say they’d like to do someday. I’d say a majority of people feel, at one time or another, that they could write a book. Most people say it, but most never do it.

Which brings me to the skeptics in my life. Because I’ve announced my intentions of “one day” making a living at writing, I can see how that might be mistaken for the same wistfulness that plagues so many wannabe novelists. Most people who have “one day”s sit back and wait for it to happen. “One day” I’ll run in that marathon. “One day” I’ll ask that guy out. They don’t make any concrete move toward their goals.

I say “one day” because there are so many variables. I can’t make someone like my work. I can’t make them buy it. And if no one buys it, it will never pay the bills. That’s life. I say “one day” because there’s no way for me to set an exact timeline for when I’ll be able to make writing my only job.

All I can do is fulfill my side of the contract. I can only control my output. I have to write, every day, no matter what, if there’s any hope of making it. I have to get better with every story, because it’s my job not to disappoint the reader. I have to bust my ass to make this novel the best I can. And the novel after that. And the one after that. Then I have to get my stuff out there, get people to see it, and hope like hell they like it.

Whether or not my “one day” ever comes rests squarely on my shoulders, and if I don’t work for it it never will.

(This post was inspired by someone who demanded I recruit followers for their writing instead of doing any work themselves. It doesn’t work like that. Sorry, Bro.)

There’s a Book! And I’m In It!

Stefanie Snider

What’s this? It’s the first time I’ve seen one of my stories in print, that’s what. I think I may have frightened the nice Purolator lady with my screeching. Just a little.

Daily Frights 2012 from Pill Hill Press.

Never Grow Up

Stefanie Snider

I’ve been melancholy lately. Things have been weighing really heavily.

But right now, they don’t matter.

Because guess where I am.

I’M IN A FORT.

My husband made me a fort.

Then he made me weird little shadow puppets. (This one’s a jackal.)

I feel like a little kid again, and it’s the best. Ever.

Insomnia, My Best Worst Friend

Stefanie Snider

Couldn’t sleep last night. That won’t surprise many of you; I have sleeping…issues. Mostly I can’t get settled, can’t shut my brain off. The longer I lie there, not sleeping, the more resentful I become. It starts off a horrible cycle where I’m angry because I can’t sleep, and I can’t sleep because I’m so angry. I finally drifted off around 4:30. I had to be up at 5:30 for DayJob.

Why am I telling you this?

BECAUSE…as I stared off into the darkness, my mind wandered and BAM! fell right into an idea. An idea for a novel. Pieces fell together and suddenly I had a loose outline, a title, hell, even a cover all planned out.

I rolled over and told myself I’d revisit it today, to see if any of my half-asleep ramblings actually made sense. I even (and this is a cardinal sin: writers, look away) decided not to get up and write any of it down. I figured I might forget it, sure, but it was late and I was busy in the throes of a bitchy little funk.

Luckily, it stayed with me. And the more I think about it, the more I like it.

I’ve never had a story come together so easily before. I have whole little mind-movies climbing over each other to be written. And they make sense and they work.

This is easily the most excited I’ve been about a story, and I owe it all to that sleep-sucking rat-bastard. Silver linings, I guess.

(And no, I won’t tell you what it’s about)

Not Just a Word Nerd

Stefanie Snider

I find so much inspiration in art. In filmmaking, in special effects, in design. In the artists themselves, in people who are RIGHT NOW making and writing and drawing and painting. Isn’t that exciting? I see so many successes and so much potential in my artistic peers that I can’t help wanting to join them in making something fantastic.

I didn’t go to an art school (though I wanted to), and I don’t have a ton of artsy friends (though those that I do know are remarkable). I have next to zero visual-art ability. But it tickles my creativity to peek into the lives of artists who are as we speak creating amazing and wonderful things.

So, check out A Studio Visit with Allison Sommers at hifructose.com. Her art is impressively detailed and instantly recognizable. I want to live in her studio.

I also love Nikki Burch’s illustrations and cartoons; she’s been a favourite of mine for quite a while. Her stuff is dark, but silly and fun at the same time. She uses teeny tiny little pen and brush strokes that make me glad I don’t have to print out my stories by hand.

And although I only get some of the references, I’m 200 pages in on Art Student Owl and it’s made me smile and laugh more times than I can count. Underneath the smart-assed jokes, though, it’s genuinely nice to think of all these artists out there giving up so much to maybe, someday, get somewhere doing what they love. I admire that, because I’m working toward a future where I can put my writing first.

(I just realized it is in fact Monday and this should have been a Movie Monday post. I’m sure the world at large will cope.)

Happy New Year’s!

Stefanie Snider

My dark little darlings:

I hope you have a great time tonight, and that you arrive home safely. I want to write about blood and guts being splattered everywhere, not hear about it actually happening. Where’s the fun in that?

As for the Sniders, we’ll be watching New Year’s Evil, playing Saint’s Row, and guzzling pots upon pots of life-sustaining coffee.

Because, y’know, we are Party. Animals.

Here’s hoping the new year brings you all kinds of awesome. And, presuming we don’t all explode in a ball of fiery 2012 world-ending doom, I look forward to the year with you.

Mr Buster’s Bodies

Stefanie Snider

My newest ebook! Click to purchase.

Mr Buster’s figured out an easy way to make a little extra cash. Who’s going to miss a few dead bodies, anyway?

The Joys of Editing. No, Really.

Stefanie Snider

I edited the hell out of a story last night. I changed almost everything and mercilessly butchered my darlings until only the proudest were left standing. The more I edited the more I realized the first draft really had been…less than great. A little wooden and a whole lot disjointed. Shitty, to be blunt. As I was editing, I kept wondering how I’d ever liked the story in the first place.

And still, this morning, I’m pretty high on accomplishment. I love the story now. It’s decent, and it flows, and dare I say it’s even a little funny.

A huge part of why I used to give up on stories is that when you’re writing the rough draft, it’s easy to hate the story. Sometimes it’s easy to hate yourself a little, too. I’m no good at this. How the hell did I ever expect to get anywhere? It will never be good. My friends and family are just being kind and really they think I suck ass.

I’d heard all the quotes from famous authors belittling the first draft, bitching about how the first draft sucks, will always suck. I heard it, but I didn’t believe it. Surely, these incredible artists were just being modest, or were venting their frustrations hyperbolically.

It took me a long while, years, to feel the truth of what I’d been hearing.

So from someone who’s not a famous author (yet), if you’re teetering on the precipice, pay attention: it sucks. It will suck, hard. But the joy is in fixing all those what-the-hells, smoothing and sticking together the jagged bits with Bondo and silly-string and whatever else you keep in your bag of tricks.

Now I realize that the worse the rough, the more fun it is to attack it in editing. Now you have a basic plan in mind, a beginning-middle-end of some sort, and you get to run in there, machete swinging, and mercilessly mow down anything that invaded your story’s territory when you weren’t looking. Stupid character? Whack ’em. Boring part? Light something on fire and watch ’em panic. The best part is seeing what you can do to mix it up a little.

So take joy in your shitty first drafts. Look forward to the cruel revenge you will take on anything that dares not be good. Keep a metaphorical knife in your teeth and madman’s glimmer in your eye. Love it, or strike it dead.